Serenity Personified

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Everything seems to end with a blink in the eye. I never wish this things to happen but somehow unlike drama series, it seems familiar. I wilted as the truth were revealed. It simply memories now and i treasure it well deep within my heart. Sitting gloomily by the side of my bed, no one knew the secret agony deep in my soul.

This special thanks are dedicated to Atikah,Sheila,Charissa,Ish,Fina,Shahira and Rafidah.Thank you your moral supports that i have been wanting for. I really appreciate it and i love you people.

I am so concern about my face now!

I start to realise that i need to take care my normal follicle or simply i will just end up having Follicular Pustule. Then it will slowly turn into in Inflammatory Nodule and i will just end up having a hideous scar on my face.

I am sick. It isn't anything new and i feel so didapitated by it. I feel so much warm surrounding my whole body and the flu is unbearable. I just doesn't seem to get the answer what or how it triggered my nose. My throat is burning. I feel like as if i swallowed a porcuipine and someone is tickling the adam apple.

This word no longer exist in my life anymore.

Labels: Over

Blogged @ 10:11 PM

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Art hasn't been any vulnerable for me in alot of ways but somehow,i want to be successful in the career of art! Art was average earlier in the morning. We were made to sit outside since the sec 4s & 5s needed the room more than we do; I understand. The noise level outside were beyond describtion. Ms Mona made me draw this clown fish to coordinate with the theme that i had chosen. It's beyond my capabilities to complete it or should i try my best? The other art students were made to draw their items and i went HALO? They were made to draw shirts,bags and even necklace. It is way so easy okay compared to mine;Stupid Coral Fishes!

We need to draw the ouline outside the room and i was actually sleeping. I am so bushed! Also with the stress i am coping with gives me headache at times. So i was lying my head down and i didn't realise the art teacher of mine came out and she went "Indra,Wake up! Do your outline now!" Okay my fault i guess and at that point of time,there was actually nothing that came through my mind for me to hide myself away or to give the reason. But eventually,A soft voice from the background spoke up and said 'Indra is sick." Ms Mona went "Okay,Go wash your face." Thank you so much to that unheard voice that came to my rescue.

Shall i conclude everything? Secondary 3 is not a honeymoon year for us! My time hasn't been spent wisely what's more with the different roles that had been given to me. I only slept for like 4 hours each day to complete my assignment. I miss Lower secondary life where there is no immediate task given. I remebered i use to reach home at 6pm after shopping with my friends and upon reaching to my room, i was in a daze in my wonderland. Wow! Time does travel that fast.

And yar...Here is the worst fact about singaporeans nowadays; THEY ARE GETTING MORE AND MORE....KIASU! I mean seriously. When the clock strikes at 7am, the Mrt train will start to go packed! That is the main issue here and i hope the government will do something to improve on it. SERIOUSLY! I was in the train and i am suppose to alight at the incoming station. When the door opened,I crossed over my right feet onto the platform and before i knew, People are pushing their way inside the train. I was like a salmon trying to resist the current and for goodness sake! Early in the morning and i am pissed!

And i started to get mad. I did raised my voice and said "WALAO! SO KIASU!!!"

All of them were staring at me, giving that decent look on their faces =.=

I swear i got the intention to give them a hard tight slap on their back!

I DON'T CARE! I AM NOT AT FAULT, MIND YOU!!!

@#%$^*&#@$%^*&

That is the fact about life, get the picture?

SAYONARA :D

Labels: Decent?

Blogged @ 11:44 PM

Sunday, July 27, 2008

The Biology Student.

I conglomerate my brain cells to study my Biology and i put aside mathematics somehow it end up inside my drawer. I am so lazy to memorise all the despicable notes in to my brain and deliberately, it sucks big times. Suddenly it stucked me and i need Ms Wong now. Hey, she is good okay! I like her thinking mindset and i respect her for that.

For somehow, I wasn't been talking to Kenneth since a long time. I am just afraid that he flared at me due to the string of vulgarities that i striked him with. Hey, i apologise for that. I guess it's my fault that probably made him ostracize me. I should not implicate others but this is what i had done towards him. It really clobber down my perceptions and this is what the outcome is.

Can i take my words back for granted?

I am sorry and perhaps, let time tells the story.

Boo...I am tired. Screw mathematics and Biology tomorrow.

Pancreatic juices+Polypeptides+Duodenum

+Oesophagus+Epiglottis+Quadratic Equations+Graph

= BONKERS!!!

Labels: The guilty remains silent

Blogged @ 11:57 PM

TODAY!

I shall study at home and mug for Maths and Biology since the test is tomorrow. I shall incalculate the habbit of 'Put things first' if not nothing will be accomplish. I shall keep myself on track today and later on i will be out with my family. A poverty cycle that goes round and round. Sometimes,i realise as a student myself,i spent 3/4 of my life in school rather than at home and that isn't a good thing i guess.

YESTERDAY!

I went for the malay competition. Met Baizurah at Jurong East platform and we took the longest route to Toa Payoh. We did that as to reward ourselves with the empty seats.We started gossiping through out the journey.Hey,gossiping is fun okay! Then we met Emman there and we took our own sweet time to reach the venue. Half-way there,we met our competitors seating at Macdonalds and for goodness gracious,they had fun staring at us! Erm,Excuse me? Can you all concentrate on your breakfast meal instead of staring at us? Do you want me to poke every single of your eyeballs?

When the competiton started,I seriously thought we couldn't match up with the rest of the other schools standard but instead we did better. I am proud of Emman and Baizurah as we managed to pull through this competition. We managed to answer the question without having any doubts and guess what? Baizurah managed to answer all the question in a straight row! That is so commendable and i guess she's the only one who could do that. But as for me,Erm here's the funny thing. I could answer all the medium-hard question but when it came to the simple ones,I went speechless. The word was swimming and i had difficulties with it. How dumb! I just hope we will get into the finals and bring glory to the school.

Then had our lunch and bus-ed to Botanic Garden. We had camwhore madness! Here's the picture that we snapped together.

We pretended to be a Kiasu yet Photogenic tourist & look at our bonus faces!

We had done our very best and i am proud of each and everyone of them. All i can say is that i am confident with the outcome! I LOVE THEM!

Friday,was Racial Harmony day in our school. It was fun as i managed to skipped lessons for the whole day! Here are pictures!

Sayonara :D

Labels: I miss you badly

Blogged @ 12:10 PM

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Drama Day?Alot of things happened today and i was didapitated. Firstly my malay;I just could believe it that neither Me nor Baizurah gotten the highest for our common test. I was so disapointed and devastated with the results and i mean no offence here. URGH! How can that be?!

Character Education was a free period i guess? Dionne can't stop crying over something that Lucas had done to her. I should not elaborate any further here and the situation wasn't so bad after all that can conclude molesting or something. Just something minor and the way Dionne cried can be heard from a distance. WOW! Not bad uh Dionne! Keep it up! Heh just being witty:D Lastly Me and Sheila was pissed off with that Thean Yew! He super damn irritating i tell you!!!

Art...Nothing to say! All i can say is that i went speechless and bonkers too!

English was okay except for Sheila! She damn funny i tell you. She was arguing with the teacher and she was obviously wasn't sastified with that Mrs Yeo! Sheila raised her voice and Kong Li like somehow join in the big fun!

I am so agitated now and somehow i went over the lethargic illness again!

Atikah: Be strong okay? Cheer up and think on the positive side:D

Sheila: Just now you went insane is it? Haha:D

Kenneth: No comments scandal!

Labels: Drama fusion

Blogged @ 8:12 PM

Sunday, July 20, 2008

My Brain Cells Are Partially Dead!

Yet again i planned to study but somehow i wasn't keeping myself on track. I am so dreadful to study and my face is stuck to this laptop screen. Probably i need to focus correctly rather than wasting myself here. I shall start revising at 5.30 and i will be back at around 10pm? Shit! Band tomorrow morning; Again troubling with people attending for band. This has been a major issue since like...Ummm? I am not sure.

Somehow this picture on top here brings back a thousand and one simply memories. I shall not describe it as a turbulent past but instead a journey for this two classmates! I remembered we had a tiff during our sec 1 years. We couldn't get along and she cried over the tiff. Seems i don't know why. But now time has changed. We are so close now! I simply treat her as my best friends and it is vulnerable for me. I am so random here...I shall now declare that Sheila Chew is inside my best friend list now!

Haha. That women in the picture is simply the best,bimbotic,bandmates and best friends in the whole entire region. I sounded so lame here but anyway. I treat her like my sister and i wonder why people kept asking this,"Are you both siblings?" Should i say a yes? Ummm...I remember the time that i sat beside her during SYF last year. I was a clarinetist back then. She kept me entertaining and her gossiping skills is much appreciated by me. It was the best time in my life meeting her. Fatin Fadhillah is loved. Thank you my tetek for everything you had done for me!!! Should i say i love you? Nahhh just this once, I lOVE FATIN!:D

Somehow i miss being a clarinetist myself. Not to say i hate playing bass-clarinet but is so randomly boring. I miss playing the high notes on clarinet and can easily be squeak. Oh men! I also miss the running notes on clarinet especially the term 'SaPaRuRaMen' Somehow it brings back memories. Rather than bass-clarinet sustaining note,playing crotchets and lots of air need to be pushed through. I understand that i am important to support the whole band;So called the leg of the band. Urgh...2 more years to go!!! Patience Indra!!!

Labels: randomly retarded

Blogged @ 4:40 PM

Game Over!

I just could not kept the words that i promised.

I had been putting up a false show

in fact i am hurting inside.

I shall not shed any tears

but i will.

What is over is over. There is no point thinking nor talking about it.

Let me have the relapse of my mind.

Take me away to a secret place...

Labels: Take me away

Blogged @ 1:24 PM

Am i having Insomnia?

I can't seem close my eyes and start to wonder in my wonderland. Somehow i miss drooling my saliva on my pillow. Isn't that the best damn thing?

Oh yes! I miss Obs. Freaking shit rindu sey. I miss my Da Gama watch and the members there especially Joshua Ong! I remebered that he sang for me 'Bleeding Love' during the sea expedition. I was having sea-sick madness and i lied down. It was freaking painful i tell you; Imagine you're out there in the sea for 10 long hours. All i can say is that it is 100% tiring for sure and is damn shitty boring. Turn to your left or right, it's just sea water. Luckily i have a portable MP3 along; Joshua! Thank you so much lar!!!

I am not gaying about him but i treat him as my brother. ONLY :D

Suddenly i want money to flourish down from the sky! I need at least 800 bucks to go shopping. I need to update myself rather to stick on with what i have. Guess i am so materialistic than what i usually thought. I want to lavish with Prada bags and Topman clothings. As for shoes, i need some smart shoes. I don't like going all about with slippers or sandals or even aqua shoes. It's like, yikes!! Disgusting!!

I AM FREAKING SO WAY TIRED!

Labels: Insomnia

Blogged @ 1:21 AM

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Sadly Unwritten

Finally, i managed to steal the laptop from my sister. I shall begin by saying that i am not feelin good and in the mood for nothing. I am having the sky-high stress disease with 6 test coming up next week. It is so deteriotating and i planned to study today but somehow i got no mood to squeeze my brain juice.

Yesterday was alright. Had Geography in the first period and Victor was back from his absent from the previous day. I had no idea what on earth had strucked him as he kept entertaining the whole class. We were sitting right at the back and people in front kept turning behing after huming his tune and stared at us. He was singing Click five songs and at times, i wonder why wouldn't he just join the Clementeen idol contest. I strongly agree that he has good voice and looks. WHY?

Biology is full of crap!

P.E was fun. We played don't know what version of netball but somehow those irrtants which mainly consist the chinese girls wasn't enthusiastic about the game. Come on! You don"t have to do this until you made Atikah pissed off right? Can you twist your brains abit to think that this just only a game. A game not a tournament!

Enough of lessons!

Then band;Another havoc! There were only 30 people who turns up for band and i was so ferocious that i feel like burning down the band room. This is specially dedicated for the bandmates! To think that we only have 55 members in band,stop thinking that you are not important. Stop being so self-centered and giving reasons to the ex-cos or your SLs that you have headache or some other trashing rubbish you have provided! Do you know how deteriotating it was sitting there waiting for people to turn up? The most disapointing thing is that some of you are the Section leaders and Executive Members! We had given you the trust to enable you to lead in whatever way there are for you but this is what i get?! As a student conductor myself,i know that it is not easy to lead but with your cooperation,everything can gets done! Have you ever think for those other bandmates who regularly turned up for band? I can see for myself who are working so hard and who is not! Even Sheila has improve on her attendance lately and that is so commendable. Think!

We are one band one sound!!!

Dinner with Fatin,Ishvinder,Sheila and Kong Li at LJS. I wasn't really have the mood to eat but i could not resist my body temptations to eat; and i think im fat due to eating fast-food way too often. Then went to sky garden with Sheila and Kong Li to play the circle turning wheel thing and we snap some photographs. We pretented to be models and capturing for our photo albums.

Labels: Why is this happening?

Blogged @ 11:32 PM

Thursday, July 17, 2008

THE ELUSIVE STAR?

"Sheesh!" That word seems familiar right? That word belongs to HANE the pain and i miss her.

Maths are boredom i mean seriously.

English is funny.Take this scenario...

Mrs yeo:Those without your books go to your class and take it now!

We: Yes!

Mrs yeo: i will accompany you guys upstairs.

We:Okay!

7 people went out from the class including me

(I mean i lost my freaking book and what do you expect?!)

Mrs yeo:Okay this way to the general office and we gonna see the Vp!

7 people turned back and walk back into the class!

I was like a dumb ass standing up and went outside and come in again with a frightened heart! I was so pissed! Hello!?

POA is shitty! Next week test again.

Ce is funny. We were talking about races and religious so kenneth made stupid comments and the class were laughing about him. Kenneth, can you keep your comments to yourself? Haha. But anyway it was funny and i love every single things that he does!

Malay combined with the rest of the malay students. Nothing actually happened today. Very bored! Oh yar! Kenneth got an american dick while Glenn got a japanese dick! See, i am insane to get to know about this O.O"

After school went to Masquerade to change our clothing for racial harmony day with charissa and i will be wearing a cassanova costume that day! Charissa will be wearing a victorian gown on the day itself and it was freaking bloomy at the bottom.

I miss my Bassclarinet. Hello? I am the owner or a PRESTIGE bassclarinet and it cost over 12 thousand bucks! Obviously i will love it to death!

Labels: Saliva is drooling...

Blogged @ 8:05 PM

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

THERE SHOULD BE NOTHING TO BE HAPPY ABOUT!

LALALA! Geography was boring but elyas kept me awake the whole period. We did something sinful i guess and it was vulnerable for me. Art was free period! YEAH! I didn't complete my art homework so you should understand why i am so ecstatic. English i cannot stand but burst into laughters thanks to Atikah and Kenneth. Somehow i don't know what was kenneth's problem. He kept disturbing me and taking my pencil box. Like i know lar i miss you but you need not have to react for this. Maths Kenneth ask this deteriotating question.

"EH! You miss me ar? You want suck or poke?!"

I went speechless. Oh my goodness sake!!!

Then after school something happened and i shall not elaborate here. I wasn't really happy with the situation now. Oh Yar!!! The band biggest bitch sucks lar!!! You think you big ar? Slap your breast then you know. Fucker i hate you lar. Stop showing your concerns for the band in fact the band standard is dropping now! You think being biased in front of the whole band is good?! If you want to know who the person really is,ask me personally and if i say no means NO! If you are the person, i will roll my eyes and walkaway. That is where my true diva bitch shines! Please lar for goodness sake; Fatin and me hates you to the damn core! Fatin, I miss you tetek. Band friends forever! we are siblings right? HEH!!!

Days are getting horrible and i feel shitty now.

Labels: Why is this happening?

Blogged @ 8:52 PM

Sunday, July 13, 2008

MY MIND IS SCREWED~

I Miss alot of things and it is playing through my mind. I have tons of homework and i need someone to my rescue. I have not sort out some band things yet and it is killing me. I miss alot of people and here's the list of them...

Syarafina
Rafidah
Emman
Sheyra
Baizurah
Elyas
Shazuan
Irfan
Atikah
Safiah
Hidayu
KENNETH(ALOT!!! Happy or not scandal? *****!!!)
Sheila
Fatin
Syahirah
Michelle
Farhain
Joshua Ong
Shafinah
Kong li

Here's the complete 20 person on my list and i miss them alot though it's only 2 days. I am insane right now and something must have triggered me somehow. I have indulged 2 vanHoulten chocolates,1 jar of skippy peanut butter and a bar of toblerone chocolate. See, I just could not resist my body temptation. I want to sleep my whole entire life but i will be missing out things in life. Is there a solution to this?

English-Lame shit
Maths-Bored to death
Malay-Homeworks and more
Art-I went speechless +.+
Biology-I don't know anything
Chemistry-Can die
Geography-Alright

Sudddenly i feels that i have much more bigger responsibilities than the others. I know it well and i know must fulfil it.

Labels: Is this a karma???

Blogged @ 6:36 PM

Thursday, July 10, 2008

A NEVER HAPPY ENDING.

Sheesh...I do not really know the innermost feeling in myself right now,I mean i still can get emotional if things horendous occuring around me. This mixed feeling really troubled me and not to say it is hard but i am not prepared to break down and cry. It is just like a pot of curry added with so many spices. The different spices represents my feelings and I could not really say how i feels now. I really do not know the causes that triggered my whole body...

Devastated
Irritated
Pissed Off
Contented
Stress
And many others...

Today was alright i guess. Geography was fun but really I could not stand Elyas and Victor's laughter i mean it is so contageous but later on victor fell sick during mathematic lesson. OORRR!!! Rest well okay??? Drink plenty water hor. Somehow i sounded like my mother. I was enjoying every seconds of laughter in malay lesson. Eeman,Rafidah,Baizurah,Safiah,Farhain and me was so busy talking. Then we snap some of Luqman's picture. I do agree that he is cute and i envy him for his looks. Alot of people are chasing after him can. Sorry Luqman. I was so deteriorating during that lesson like super hell!!! From Luqman topic to facial creams. Then after school went to eat with Shafinah and Wirnida in the canteen. Wanted to eat with my friends but i stayed back too long doing my class duty. URGH!!! So went on to play soccer with them but still, i sit aside due to something that is bothering my mind and menonton perlawanan bola yang tidak kurang baiknya!!! 2 Elusive soccer players men. Woo not bad. Then went off to jurong point and Collect my laptop and paid the remaining balance of $1100 since my sister deposited her own money first. Then home-ed and here i am blogging. Oh yeah! There is this fucker message me without telling me who the hell he/she is. Kept on denying. It is so irritaing and i am pissed off!!! FUCKING COWARD!!! Still dare to asked me personal question!!! I'm gonna curse you,BITCH!!!!

Chemistry test
Geography test
2 Coca-cola shading
Mindmaps on Seafood
2 Malay composition
English test
Band Scales test

THIS IS JUST THE BEGINING AND THERE IS STILL MORE TO COME!

I MISS YOU SECRET INFATUATION!!!

EVERYDAY IS SUCH A DISSAPOINTMENT. DAMN YOU PEOPLE!!!

Labels: Break down and cry.

Blogged @ 8:31 PM

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Life Is Not A Bed Of Roses

Morning woke up supposingly i need to meet Atikah at Clementi mrt but she was late. I was fine with it. Plus we both suppose to have an assembly speech today but it was post-poned to tomorrow. Yeah! Indeeed it was rather fun today;SERIOUSLY! I enjoy every bits of happy moments just now. Basically this is what happened...

English:For goodness sake! It was so dead boring but still, Irfan and Atikah jokes made me burst into laughters. It was so fun at the same time listening to our Teacher nagging. I could not tolerate her as she was talking about some self characteristic things and pinch of religious things. URGH!!! She keep picking on Atikah and obviously Atikah was damn pissed off with her. I mean i am not siding anyone here but sometimes it is rather unreasonable that Atikah seriously did not talk and she gets the scolding. Here's a short scenario...

Mrs Yeo: Keep quiet Atikah!

Atikah: F***!!!

Mrs Yeo: That's very rude! Respect begets respect!

Atikah: (Rolled her eyes)

Art: Ms Mona was not really happy with us due to something. She talk to us for at least 3/4 of the period but still,She wants the best for her art students. I really think through about what she said earlier on and yeah, I will put in 120% of my best effort in art. I am still deciding on the theme for the mini coursework. I promised to myself that i will get at least an A2 for my art.

Malay: Busy talking with Eeman and Rafidah. Rafidah wored her retainer and she sound 'pelat'. Hahaha. Damn funny:D

POA: Ms choo was okay today. Atikah sat beside me and i wasn't really paying much attention with her around. We kept on gossiping and camwhore. It was tiring though. Wanted to sleep but bet with me a MILLION DOLLARS Ms Choo gonna bang your table!!!RARRR!!!

After school went to orchard with Eeman,Nafsiah and Jia Yan. Eeman need to get another ipod or something then accompanied him. After that, The girls went off and we both enjoyed our lunch at Seoul Garden. i will update the pictures soon. I try but no promises. Basically everything was fine other than some shocking news. Indeed i ENJOYED tuesday 8th of july!

Braces:I really think that i need you right here by my side. I miss you alot but i wasn't sure how you gonna react to this shit that i am getting from you.It felt so close but it was further than what i thought. I felt like a butterfly with a brokened wings. I feel so insecure and my mind going wild. Do think about how i feel right now. It's not painful but a MISERY. Miss you braces :(

Labels: I'm still doubting but i still continued

Blogged @ 5:01 PM

Monday, July 7, 2008

I Smiled Bleakly As The Memories Pierced Through My Heart.

I am back from Courts with my sister and we bought an Acer laptop at the price of $1899. Kinda cheap to me but still no regrets at all. Back at Jurong point i saw Min and Hui lin so just smiled and waved at them. Then went to Fox and met Atiqqa with her family. My vision was blurred at first since i did not wear my contact lens but still i managed to see things through. But deep in my heart, i felt so demoralised by someone. Someone that had been with me for 5 days. He really made me realise that i am someone different, someone that is beautiful in their own way. I really miss him terribly. Some how i just hope to see him and have a long chat with him.I did sms-ed him but no reply. I was so devastated. I feel like my friendship with him is just a waste of time and effort but still, his face will remain in my thoughts. I feel damn hurt.

Labels: I miss you badly;Braces

Blogged @ 7:58 PM

Nothing much happened today as usual, ROTTING at home. Woke up at 11+ and received 12 missed calls from Fina darling; It's our anniversary today!!! A year had passed and we are still going on strong. I Love You Alot!!! Then went online and here i am chatting with Amos,Michelle and the all time favourite babe ever, NUR RAFIDAH!!! Yeah we were talking about laptops and some other personal issues. For laptops cause i'm buying 1 later at courts with my sister. OMG;YEAH BABY! i wanted the red Vaio but idah said it isn't good other then the striking red that i had been admiring for a pretty long time. Probably i'm buying a new Jack pursell school shoes but it isn't confirm yet. It all depends on my sister mood la. I am very reluctant towards her...How evil.

Labels: Jovial Baby

Blogged @ 3:30 PM